Once a mother always a mother

One:  LGF has left to go overseas for 7 months.  One is over here to distract himself as he has terrible panic attacks when she goes away.  Even though they aren't "officially" a couple.  Just good friends.  He will stay the night (has to sleep on the couch!) and tomorrow Three will move over to stay with One and Fireman Sam for a few days.  As I write One and Three are laughing hysterically at bad taste TV and youtubes.  A sound that makes my heart sing.

Two:  Had his surgery today.  His jaw was broken and reset and his wisdom teeth removed.  Himself and I went in to see him and had to wait and wait.  He had some urinary retention and needed a catheter.  GGF was with him.  I am jealous.  If you understand that, great; if you don't then you probably aren't a mother.  It's not something I like but it's the truth and I'm not ashamed of it either.  As I explained to Himself, if it was One I'd be OK cos he is 24 and adult.  If it was Three I'd be there and wild horses wouldn't stop me cos he's 19 and still a kid (shaddup).  But Two is neither one nor the other but a blend of the two.  And I don't want to step on toes.  Anyway, nuff about me.  He looks battered and bruised.  His mouth was full of blood and he had a bandage holding his jaw up.  He developed a rash that they think was caused by the drug in the PCA (patient controlled analgesia) so he now has to ask for pain relief.  Which is tricky when he can barely speak.  He is in ICU at the moment so that shouldn't be too much of a problem as they have one on one nursing.  He kept apologising for making Dad sad (we were both upset at his appearance and he knows his dad doesn't deal well when he can't fix things!), kept telling me he loved me and kept thanking the nurse everytime she tended to him.  My heart didn't know whether to swell with pride or break with the distress of seeing him like that.  Either way it hurt.  But mostly in a good way cos I know that he will have so much more confidence in himself when all this is over (another story for another day).

Three: Realised that mother was a tad stressed yesterday and agreed to come for a walk with me along the beach (see above photo).  We parked the car close to the interim apartment and walked down towards where we will be living permanently.  It is a lovely beach and I am looking forward to lots of walks.  And the best thing is that this is the beach at the end of the river path so we will have it there for ever.  Three and I had a good chat about everything and nothing.   And as I said before, he and One are sitting on the couch watching boy stuff and laughing.

Looks as if the heart will continue to ache.  For good reasons.

silver linings

Himself had 'words' with a couple of people and the current position is that we SHOULD be finished by mid-September.  As I said before, it's not the completion date that annoys me, it's the fact that we were led to believe that it would be much earlier.

I have rejigged my annual leave and am now taking 4 weeks spread over a couple of months!  A week to move out of here, then back to work for 4 weeks, then another week to move into the new place (please God!) and then back to work for a fortnight (so my boss can take some of her annual leave) and then a final two weeks to enjoy the new place.  Another plus is that last week was my last full week.  I have a training day this week and an ADO the next.  When I come back I will work 4 day weeks until mid-september and then I will be working 7 days a fortnight.  Which is still more than I would really like but I'll see what happens come December and make a decision then.

Himself and I have been looking on line for somewhere to stay and he popped into a couple of real estate agents with little joy.  We went down to the golf club on Friday and stayed the night with friends down there.  Yesterday morning I rang the number of some serviced apartments close by the new place.  We were told we could have a studio apartment for $770 a week.  That is a lot but we realised we would have to pay for the convenience.  We went and had a look.  It was tiny.  And damp.  And dark.  And smelled of stale urine.  The woman told us she had a better apartment in another location that we could have for $1000+ a week.  We said we would think about it.

Himself had been given the name of someone who might have something and I rang her.  We met her at the property and were delighted.  It's right on the beach, 2 bedroom, fully furnished and light and airy (and smells of nothing!).  And is $800 a week.  I am thinking of this as a holiday.  Even though we will be working there will still be opportunities for walks on the beach and general relaxing.  And if we went away for a holiday we would have paid that and then some for accommodation.  And Three can (and probably will!) stay with us.  He will spend some time with One and Fireman Sam and some time with us.

Two is going into hospital tomorrow to have his jaw broken and reset.  Then he will come here for a couple of days.  He was over for dinner last night and is quite looking forward to it.  I hope we can keep his pain well controlled.

I need to go and do some more packing!  We are surrounded by boxes of stuff waiting to go to the storage facility but I still have quite a bit to pack up.  It's strange not having a house that is emptying as we are leaving all the furniture behind.  I must remember to check behind things to make sure I haven't dropped something and forgotten about it.  Could be embarrassing! 

Needless to say my coping strategies have been appalling.  With the inevitable results.  Now that things have settled down and the outlook is less bleak I have no excuses (other than addiction to an unhealthy lifestyle).  I do, however, need to remember to be gentle with myself.  And stop the all or nothing thoughts.  I have slipped back into the old way of thinking that I have to be perfect in all things or not bother at all.  So, surprise surprise, I end up not bothering.  Add a bit of 'don't deserve to feel/look good' into the mix and you end up with a very sorry state of affairs.  This will change.

And on that note I will go and pack something and then go for a walk.

GRRR

Long story short(ish)

• The builders initially indicated that we would be in by mid august.
  
• they have installed the wrong kitchen 
• Now we are looking at anywhere from 6 weeks to 8 weeks and then some
• although they can't blame that on the wrong kitchen
• but they are
• We have been given a customer service contact person
• He knows shit
• I could go on
• but I won't

4 weeks and we won't be here.  not sure where we'll be but it won't be here!  

We have been offered places to stay so we won't be homeless and we may rent a motel room or something.  It's the cats I worry about.  They will be in the cattery for at least a month and that's what makes me really cross cos if they'd given us this timeline from get go we would have moved out sooner and rented somewhere where we could have had the cats (and Three, although he's looking forward to staying with One and Fireman Sam).

On the plus side I have a day off tomorrow (de-greying and a walk or a sit and read - depends on the weather) and then we are going down to the golf club for dinner.  

And I know that whatever happens, this time in 3 months we will be in our new house.  

Blood might have been shed in the interim ...

Happy Birthday, One!

It's been quite a year!

He tried for, but didn't make, the Fire Brigade.

He has moved on from his relationship with LGF and they remain very good friends.  I'm still hoping he finds true lurve with a noice girl.

He has done very well at work and his boss is very happy with him and his pay packet reflects this.

And the big thing for him was moving out of home and into a shared flat with Fireman Sam.

But the biggest thing for me is to see my first born all growed up and happy.  What more could a mother want?

Wow ... two days in a row!

Almost getting regular!  Must be the prunes!

Baby ducks!  On the golf course!

I really must tone down my use of exclamation marks!!!!!

I love my gherkin (even though Himself has been the main driver but his car should be ready on Tuesday).  It's quite a conspicuous colour (in case you hadn't noticed!) and there are days when I might see 3 or 4 on a trip and then many days will pass without seeing one at all.

So I had to take a shot of this in the carpark at work!

It looks as if I have work until the end of December.  7 days a fortnight.  This is good.

Tomorrow I am off to a tute at uni and then on the weekend we start moving boxes out into the self storage.

4 weeks and 1 day until I'm on leave (and no longer employed full time) and this time in 5 weeks we will not be here.

A gentle learning curve

I mentioned in a previous post that I was loving my new Macbook but I realised that I hadn't mentioned why.

If you look up "spoilt rotten" or "indulgent husband" in the dictionary you will see my photo.  Well you would probably see Himself under the latter.

Anyway.  I was whingeing (as is my wont) about the fact that my PC was as slow as a wet week, notwithstanding the fact that thanks to Three we were on dial up speed again.  One had been touting the features of Macs and Himself went out a couple of Saturdays ago and came home with this.

One 'showed' me how to do certain things (which involved him moving his fingers over the keyboard at high speed and saying "there you go") and so I was not very confident.  The delightful Two came over last night for dinner (with GGF) and because he and I are very similar ("now I know where I get my anal retentiveness from ... noone else I know would spend 5 minutes trying to decide what to name a bookmark folder"  and I love you too, son!) and we learn the same way and he is a teacher and he has infinite patience, he showed me how to do lots of things that I wasn't sure about.  I still need to try getting my photos from my PC over here and to see what my camera does when I connect it up and Himself downloaded (uploaded?? never sure what the difference is!) a whole lot of music but I still need to connect my iPods and see what happens then.  BUT ... Two showed me how to get the photos off my phone onto this.  (My PC didn't have bluetooth and I never got around to fiddling with cords and CDs and stuff).

And that, folks, is a very longwinded way of saying that the photo at the top (albeit small) is a panoramic view of the the lake and the road you know where.  Pretty, isn't it?

This will be the view from our very own window (without the scaffolding and cyclone wire fencing- duh!)

And this one was taken back in April and is the view from the other side of the river looking back across at us.

Every time we go down there I just feel at peace.  Which, the way things are going at the moment, is a very welcome feeling.

Tomorrow I should find out if I am going back after my 5 weeks off.  I put my hand up for 7 days a fortnight which is more than I really want to do but it will only be til December and then I can reassess.  Then again, they might say no.  And I wouldn't be devastated if they did.

I have shied away from exercise again and I think a lot has to do with the fear of injury.  My foot is still not right.  I realise that when I was working out with Fireman Sam last year I was working incredibly hard.  Whilst part of me misses that intensity there is a part that realises that I was probably doing it a bit too hard.   The good thing is that I am missing being active so I need to give the whole thing a lot of thought.

And as Miz S has said, I think the PT is the way to go.  So now I need to do some research and find one.  I'm sure I will meet a new neighbour who can recommend someone.

If any of my few readers haven't discovered Tammy go and have a look.  She doesn't update NEARLY enough but her writing is so thought provoking.  

5 weeks and 5 days to go

And then we will be homeless!  The new place is coming along really well so hopefully we will have to depend on friends for a very short time.  The cats have begun their vaccination course (haven't been done for years - BAD owner) and were NOT happy yesterday.  We had a look at a cattery today.  It is also a boarding kennel and there was a lot of barking dogs but the cats that were there didn't seem fazed.  I would prefer just a cattery but they are few and far between and I want somewhere close to both houses.  They will pick up and deliver, too, which will be great.

We have started to pack.  The place looks like a tip.  Himself has registered online for a self storage facility and if they have the size we want we will start to shift boxes and bits down next weekend.  Because the new owners are taking so much of our old furniture I want to get stuff out so I don't inadvertently leave something behind.

The exercise took a bit of a back seat this week.  I went for a run on Tuesday morning and got caught in a massive downpour about half way down the street so I sloshed back and jumped back into bed.  A few late nights and wet mornings haven't helped things.  I have been doing a lot of research online looking for different programs to follow once we have moved.  Not sure yet whether to train by myself, join a gym or get a personal trainer.  I wouldn't mind having a go at a Body for Life style 12 week challenge and think I would need a trainer for good form and motivation.  Just need to find a good one.  I like the sound of Kek and think she would be an awesome trainer but she lives half way to Sydney and doesn't come down my side of town.  

Still not sure what is happening with work.  I could extend my contract for 3 months but I don't want full time work and I don't know if they will let me extend on a part time basis.  Not fussed, though.  Have so much to do down at the new place.

We went to a function at the golf club on Friday and met more new neighbours.  They are such a friendly bunch and there is a good mix of golfers and beginners so I am really looking forward to getting out there and learning properly.  

The boys are well.  One is around at the moment working on the website for the Mermaid's business.  Three is on leave and is going away for a few days with the new girlfriend.

I am loving my Macbook.  Much more user friendly than my old PC notebook.

And on that note I think I shall toddle off to bed.  4 days this week cos I am at a uni tute on Friday.

Photos will be forthcoming when One shows me how to get them off the PC and onto here.  I am still learning!