Just a little whinge!

I went to the doctor today hoping that he would let me start to wean off my blood pressure medicaton. No such luck. Yesterday at work my BP was 119/69. Today in his office it was 140/85. I told him it was his fault! He did make a note that I might suffer from 'white coat syndrome' which I'm sure I do. I hate doctors, hospitals and anything else associated with the medical profession with a passion. If you are sick or have had a baby or are in hospital for anything at all and I come and visit you be surprised and honoured! Which might give you an insight into how challenging Two's throat issues can be for me.

Anyway. He weighed me but I asked him not to tell me what the result is as I am weighing on Thursday on my scales and don't want to start stressing about whether I've lost over these last 4 weeks or not. Any serial dieter out there will understand how hard it has been not to pop on the scales for just a little peek! I have to go back and see him in another month (after my next weigh in, he said) and maybe then we can look at my meds. If not, I told him, there will be some serious negotiations happening. I had a blood test to check my kidneys, liver and cholesterol and I'll get them faxed over to work on Friday.

Friday because I got him to give me a medical certificate for tomorrow and I have called in sick. This is a big thing for me as I find it really hard to call in sick unless I am physically incapable of working. I go through a huge guilt trip but this time I thought 'bugger it'. My colleagues have been sick and spread their bugs. They have had days off here and there and we won't be seriously short staffed tomorrow. And my boss was quite good about it. Granted, she was off last Wednesday and Thursday with gastro!

I woke up at 5 this morning with the intention of going for a run. Fireman Sam was originally going to run with me but is crook. I had decided over the weekend that whether he came around or not I was going to do this run. And it had to be at 5.30 cos it's dark and there are very few people around at that time. Shuddup! When I went for my walk last night I walked around the track and imagined myself running it. When I went to bed last night I imagined running around the track. And when I woke up this morning my head was full of cold and I was coughing and my throat and chest were tight. So I went back to bed! I have done the 50 minutes on the bike and it was really hard. This is a new problem for me. I don't know what to do with my exercise routine when I'm sick! In the past I would have stopped. I am thinking I might do some light weights later on but might give the punching bag a miss (I worked it last night for 15 minutes) and go for a slightly longer walk this evening. I think anything really strenuous like the bag or running might be overdoing things as far as my lungs go at the moment.

Who would have thought 8 weeks ago that I would be worrying about not being able to run, use a punching bag, ride the exercise bike, lift weights, do pushups and crunches and walk for longer than an hour. In one day! I know this is not about the scales but I really hope there is a significant change on Thursday. Or that my body fat % has dropped significantly. SOMETHING must have changed significantly!! I have had to stop wearing a couple of bras that have become too big. And a vest I bought earlier this winter (and paid quite a bit for, wouldn't you know) has become way too big and just looks silly. My normal clothes haven't started to get too loose but I think they were way too tight before and I was reluctant to go up yet another size, so it might take another few weeks before I see a change in dress size.

I'm guess I'm just not a very patient person.

OK. I'm off to curl up on the couch and finish Wild Swans and then start Harry Potter. Wild Swans is a great book. Very harrowing when you consider that all this actually happened. And happened within our lifetime (or that of your parents if you're a young sprout). And is probably still happening to some degree or another in China and in other countries around the world.

I think I'll have a bowl of soup for lunch as well.

See ya.