Today GGF had an interview. Himself and I had offered to drive her.
I woke up this morning and couldn't get out of bed. Just couldn't face dealing with another human being regardless of how much I love them.
Himself took GGF to the interview and we are anxiously awaiting the outcome.
I have been really struggling of late with a lot of things and was seriously considering booking myself into a psych hospital as my thinking and behaviour has been rather odd.
This morning I realised that I have had a huge amount on my plate. Not only has Dad had his stroke which was bad enough in itself but I've dealt with hospitals, therapists, aged care assessment people (fantastic), doctors, pharmacies, done shopping, negotiated changing care providers AND I have looked after others on and off (Chippy had facial surgery, GGF needed to be taken to the doctor last week for morphine for a migraine, the kids have had issues, the Mermaid is studying and wanted a hand with her assignment .... and so it goes).
I know I could say no but that's not me and I'm not complaining about providing help for those I love. But I should have realised that just maybe this could all have had a negative impact on me.
I was going to pull out of my weekend in Adelaide but Himself talks sense and I'm going.
This will probably be the last post until we get home the weekend after this.
Life will return to normal - whatever normal is!!
And now back to writing a letter asking for my parents' case manager to be changed. Not easy.
Yes, it does take a toll. It takes a helluva toll. And it goes get to the point where you want to give up. And before you know it, you can see the black dog lurking just outside the door.
ReplyDeleteYes, I'm with Himself. Get thee to that holiday! :)
Good luck with everything. You know you'll make it.
Been there, done that.
ReplyDeleteLittle pills help mate.
It's that or go nuts.
I hope you can start to look after yourself too!