Just a quickie

I'm a bit late for work already!

Fireman Sam is back from playing soldiers (until January when he goes away again for another couple of weeks. Not sure how he'll go as he misses Gina terribly when he's away from her).

The two of them and Two and GGF came around for dinner last night. Steak on the new bbq! Very nice it was too. It was good to catch up and we talked about the Big Walk we are planning for 2009. One even showed some interest.

This morning Fireman Sam and I met at the park. We ran one lap of the park and we did it in about 5 minutes 30. It just about killed me. We then did another lap stopping off at the exercise stations along the way. I will be sore tomorrow. I had forgotten how hard he pushes me and how much I had missed it. 5 laps tomorrow on my own and then more of today on Friday. OUCH!

The good thing is that with this and the long walk I did on Saturday I have got away from the whole scales and weight and 'diet' food thing. Phew. I was a bit worried and very uncomfortable.

Today I am wearing a skirt with the shirt tucked in. The first time I have tucked a shirt in in years. I had to as the shirt is now a bit big and flaps around a bit. It's a tailored skirt so looks OK.

And on that note I must dash.

stand off

How's YOUR weekend going?

Amy left some interesting thoughts in yesterday's comments. Like anyone who has had a weight problem and has played on the lose/gain merry-go-round I can so relate to what she has to say. And I can also relate to that feeling of pain and disappointment in oneself. That is why I am so determined to get away from the thinking that I'm experiencing at the moment.

I went for a lovely long walk before and once Himself has finished assembling the new barbecue we bought today we will be having steak and salad for dinner. A delicious clean meal that my body is hankering for.

Christmas shopping is coming along slowly. I'll need to do some more tomorrow. At least Himself and I are sorted as the barbecue is our present to each other. The assembly of it could, however, result in divorce.

Slip sliding away

Love these swans and their chicks.

Now. Down to the topic of this entry.

Today I slipped back. Waaaaay back. Almost back to the place I was when I started this exercise jig. Well, maybe not that far back but far enough to create some antsy moments.

I have become complacent. I have received so many wonderful comments (and not just from here) that I have forgotten that initial pain. Which, in itself, is not a bad thing because that was a horrible feeling, but it did get me committed to a pattern of behaviour that resulted in some amazing transformations. Christmas is coming. I love my new job. I'm working full time. My kids are .... still my kids! Whatever the reason/excuse I want to use, I have lost the oomph. And I have been eating less well (and more of the less well). I have started to have a gin and tonic or a glass of wine every evening (see above excuses). I only ran twice this week (and I have reasons/excuses for that, too). I am still wearing the new clothes I have bought (and still receiving compliments) but I am starting to feel fat and flabby. I know this is partly the old diet mentality coming back (I've been hopping on the scales a bit too often) but it's also losing that buzz I felt when I was exercising so religiously and eating so well (and by well I mean the chocolate, cheese, cream, etc ... not just the so-called healthy stuff). Fireman Sam rang last night. He's still out there somewhere playing soldiers but is missing us. I told him that I was thinking about focussing on maintaining my weight until after Christmas and then revving things up. He thought that he might rev things up next week.

I thought about this and realised that that is exactly what I need. If I keep doing what I'm doing right now then I will probably weigh a lot more after Christmas.

Christmas is ONE DAY. But we use it as an excuse to overindulge for almost 2 months.

Fireman Sam may or may not be able to get back out training on Monday morning and I can't use that as an excuse as I know full well what I have to do. It's just easier and more pleasant (when we stop) to have him there pushing me. So I have decided that as of tomorrow I am going back to where I was about 4 months ago. I am going back to basics.

Tonight, though, I am having pizza and wine for dinner, icecream for dessert and am going to wake up feeling like shit! This is good.

I realise that this may be very disjointed (and not because of the wine ... I've just started!) but I always tend to just write what my brain thinks when I'm talking about this part of my life and it can be very jumbled (and you can be kind and refrain from pointing out that that is how I am most of the time!)

Tomorrow. No golf. Too disorganised. I am planning to hit the shops and endeavour to get the major Christmas shopping done so I can really enjoy things. A long walk. And I might get Himself to get the tree down out of the roof and consider decorating it on Sunday.

Whatever happens, I will be back into the exercising and clean eating from here on in. I can't afford to lose what I have gained (or gained what I have lost, depending on the way you look at things).

Avagoodweekend.

Christmas is coming ....

... like a frigging freight train and I am so disorganised. And yet, in a weird way I'm not overly stressed. Yet.

Last Christmas was so full on with Stepson and his family staying, the huge Christmas Eve bash, a big family Christmas Day, Three getting gastro (boy, did he get gastro) on Christmas Night, recovering from gastro on Boxing Day and then having my side of the family on the 27th (which should have been Boxing Day but ... gastro). And then Two getting arrested on the 29th at which point all things Christmas were removed from the house. I needed to do something physical.

This year has been really mixed up with super good and awful bad. I'm ready for 2008. Also the boys are well and truly grown up now so I think it's time we changed things around a bit and made the whole thing more adult and laid back.

I'm just not sure how!!

And on that note I shall get ready for work.

Oh, I went to the oncology department's Christmas bash at the medical director's house (an annual event ... and that's a bloody stupid statement, I've just realised!). It was OK. I'm glad I went cos I got to catch up with my old mates. Yet more comments on my weight loss. Including my ex boss telling the most senior administrative person there (she's dizzyingly high on the exec ... and a bit of a tyrant) how much weight I'd lost. Which I didn't feel comfortable with at all. Two was unable to drive me in the end cos he had to work til 1.00am on some crisis so I went back to a friend's place which meant that I didn't get changed but if I'd come home I would have stayed here.

And now I really am going to work.

Catch ya.

RIP iPod

You know how it was raining yesterday morning? And I got really wet? Well, so did my iPod shuffle which I wear clipped to the front neckline of my tshirt. Just as I was about to start the 5th lap it stalled, so to speak. And died. And all attempts at resuscitation failed.

Apparently iPod shuffles don't like getting very, very wet.

I was going to ask Three to get me a new one but One decided I could have his as he doesn't use it much. Only Two gave it to him for his birthday and I don't like taking something that someone else has given someone. If you get my drift. I was told to get over it. So I have put MY music on One's shuffle and will run in the morning. I will also get Three to buy me a silicon cover which will make it as near waterproof as dammit. But I still plan to replace MY iPod.

I'd better do it soon, though, as Three has scored a job at a jeans shop. It's casual to start with but that's OK. At least it's a job selling stuff he likes and looks good in. And what a shame he has to wear their stock!

I'm going to put my feet up. It was very busy at work. We had issues with plumbing that resulted in some fairly major headaches for a few people.

Monday morning

And it's pouring with rain but I did my 5 laps. Well, I figured that once I was soaked I wasn't going to get any wetter so I kept running.

I ended up going to Bentleigh and getting 4 new tshirts. Well Target had 20% off so I had to.

I forgot to mention that One wasn't successful in his interview for the fire brigade. He doesn't seem too upset about it. If anything, he is relieved that he knows one way or the other and says that the pressure is off. We think his age went against him. He was the youngest in his interview by a long shot. He will probably apply again (you get three chances and then that's it) but not for a few years. In the mean time he has a job he loves and his boss is very happy with him.

I was very flattered and touched with Miz S's entry about me over the weekend. As I've said before, I have met some fantastic people over the internet and she would be one of them. She does make me sound rather impressive but I can assure you, I was just your average run of the mill fat mother who didn't like herself. And who was fortunate to have someone who was able to take charge and get me started on this thing.

OK. I think I'm dry enough to go and have my shower.

Have a good day everyone.

The journey in pictures

These two were taken at Two's 21st. It was the night of the meltdown and a week before I started this amazing journey. I was wearing size 16 stretch pants and the shirts were 18 and 20. And tight. I was miserable.





These two were taken last night. In the top I'm dancing with Three. I still have a long way to go but the dress is a medium (size 14). And I am happy.


Yesterday we went shopping. I bought the above dress as well as a couple of skirts and three tops. The skirts are 14 and the tops are medium. I am wearing one of the skirts today. It feels so good to be wearing a skirt again. Especially as it's actually a little loose! The highlight of the day was trying on some size 12 shorts. And I could get them up and do them up! They were a little tight so I tried on a stretch pair which were fine but the zip was sewn in badly and they didn't have another pair in a size 12. I'm not fussed as I know that by the end of Summer I will be smaller again. I have enough clothes now to see me through and I may need to get some of them taken in in a couple of months.

We had a great time last night. The birthday girl was the Mermaid's daughter and I've known her all her life. It was so good to be out with the three boys and Himself. The boys had fun dancing and chatting up sundry females but were still happy to stand around and laugh and chat with their aging parents.

Today is hot and windy. I was going to go back to the shopping centre to try and get a start on the Christmas shopping for the boys but it will be packed so I'll go next week or even after work one evening. It would help if they would give me their Christmas lists!

One has had to go into work and I'll go and pick him up when he's finished. He didn't drive his car as he had a few beers last night and never drives if there is the slightest chance of him being over the limit. I'm sure he would be fine but I'm happy he has the sense to not risk driving when he's not sure.

Himself has gone to Bunnings to get a cord for the lawnmower. Three has just gone out with a mate to look at cars (for the mate, not Three ... Three has an old Subaru Liberty which we swapped with Two and GGF for One's old Mitsubishi Verada and will be getting fixed up for him. He's currently driving the old Benz which Himself wants him to sell when the Liberty is driveable ... confused? You should try being here).

I thought about a bike ride or a walk but it really is unpleasant out there. So I think I might pop down to Bentleigh and have a look at the shops and maybe grab a coffee. Or I could put my feet up and read a book. Or I could do both!

There is a Target Country in Bentleigh and I think I'll see if they have some tshirts. The ones I bought a few weeks ago are all 16 and are getting a bit loose. They are OK to run in but I want something a bit more fitted for wearing with jeans and my new skirt.

Jeeez, life's good at the moment.