Things I've been asked/heard as the wife of a man and the mother of three boys now men. They still send a chill through my soul!!
Mum I'm at the police station (OK he's making the call - this is alright) - turns out he'd been mugged on a train going to see a girlfriend when we though he was at a mate's place. Lesson learned, Three. Don't bullshit to your mother. She WILL find out! He was OK. He didn't want to tell us - the cops insisted.
Where are the bandaids (over and over again and generally results in a bloody mess - there's the need for a bandaid or a tourniquet!) The latest was tonight "what happened?" "I opened a tin of sardines for the dogs" It was more than a bandaid but not quite a tourniquet.
Don't panic but ... (too many times)
Should my "insert body part" be this colour (sometimes yes and sometimes definitely not)
The ambulance is on its way (after three launched himself into his bedhead while I was at work and Himself was in charge - no major damage done; the ambos reassured Himself and left without any passengers)
This is Sgt XXX from YYY police station (not good) a story for another day that is now quite funny.
The ambulance is on its way (after three launched himself into his bedhead while I was at work and Himself was in charge - no major damage done; the ambos reassured Himself and left without any passengers)
This is Sgt XXX from YYY police station (not good) a story for another day that is now quite funny.
The bleeding's not that bad (it's not until it is - it could be a minor scratch or a haemorrhage - they don't seem to know the difference)
How do you get blood out of XYZ (see above)
Should my toe/finger stick out of my foot/hand like this (if it's not straight up then probably not)
Can you pick me up? I'm outside CDE cop shop (this one was a bit messy but it taught a certain kid valuable lessons - don't trust arseholes and it's ok to dob them in)
I remember standing in the school office (I was president of the PTA so doing fundraising stuff and not really taking notice of what was going on around me) and seeing a kid with blood running down his back from a cut in his head. "Shit - don't envy that parent". Hi Sparkling ... glad you're here - you need to take Two to the doctor for assessment. All blonde primary school aged kids with blood streaming from their heads look the same from the back OK? Don't judge me for not recognising my own!
I am amused. And I am a little envious of she who has three sons who love their mum.
ReplyDeleteI am blessed.
DeleteOh dear.
ReplyDeleteI had a police officer come to the door once, he was a neighbor, and he said to me there's been an accident. My son was 12 and he broke some vertebrae but was ok otherwise. Neighbor should have led with, your son is ok, there's been an accident. Two months later, he broke his humerus. Only one boy but lots of blood and accidents.
Although now that I think about it, Miss Katie had lots of blood and accidents as well.
It's a miracle we survive our children:)
You'd think the police would be taught how to deliver news.
DeleteI have found that the calls don't stop as they get older. At least the police have stopped calling!
Oh, funny! Haven't had too many similar situations - worst was a dog bite but I was unavailable and the other parent had to handle it.
ReplyDeleteWe've avoided animal bites, thank goodness.
DeleteNot just boys. My daughter has given me a few stressful moments
ReplyDeleteHers were all accidents son had one episode where the police brought him home. He was caught speeding, a lot, but as he was a nice and polite boy the police impounded his car and brought him home. They usually just make you ring someone to get pick up.
Worked though. He doesn’t speed now. Thankfully
Politeness and contrition go a long way as we have found with one of ours. And police treating the kids like a human being rather than scum also helps.
DeleteHa ha......Peta
ReplyDeleteI figured but wasn't 100% !!
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