*sigh*

Or should that be *woof woof*. The black dog is scratching at my mind and I won't let him in but, lordy, it's wearing.

I know that a lot of my life style choices encourage him and I am addressing them. These last three days I have cut the wine consumption waaaaaaay back (to almost that of a 'normal' person!), I am going to gym twice a week and really enjoying it and I am trying to look at work as a job and nothing else.

But I still get antsy when I don't have my day planned or if I have it overplanned! The latter is often the norm. I cherish my days off and want to cram as much into them as possible so over commit and then freak out there is little time left for what I really want to do (sew, read, walk, cross stitch, sit!).

I gave myself permission to have a good sleep in this morning after Himself and Three had left. I did (snuggled up with Tom who smelt of rain - love the smell of cats who have just come in from the weather) and had a really strange, vivid dream which is very common when one goes back to sleep in the mornings. I then got up with plans to go for a walk down to the beach, clean and tidy the house, catch up with the Mermaid, check out a day spa for a pedicure (need to look after my poor old feet), go to the gym to pay for Himself (he's giving the PT a 12 sessions trial), go to the supermarket and get something (don't know what) for dinner and come home and cook said dinner. And sew, cross stitch, read and sit!!!!! Oh, and do the washing!

Needless to say my anxiety levels hit the roof.

So I have decided that I will potter around the place and clean and tidy. I have had breakfast (porridge with dates) and will go for a walk if I have time. Cleaning the house will certainly get me moving and the old heart rate up. I do need to work out what to do for dinner but that can be done later in the afternoon. I will ring the Mermaid to make sure she's OK (she had an important, potentially life changing dinner last night) but will go and see her tomorrow or Friday.

And the anxiety levels are falling.

So on that note I shall go and get stuck into the place.